Misery

Oh! Enticing moonlight,

Why do you try to provoke these feelings?

What are you playing at?

Oh! Lovely flowers,

Why do you try to evoke love?

What's the use of falling over me?

over this stone of a person...

There’s an end to this vast sky

But is there an the end to my misery??

There’s a lightening bolt hidden in every cloud

But is there atleast one ray of hope in my life??

A harp with broken strings

Can it ever make a melody?

In a sandy strenuous desert

Is there a prospect of finding atleast one blossomed rose?

When there was no peace on his mind

God had made this human…

And He forgot to write

Comfort,

Peace,

Happiness,

In my life story…

PS:the writing is a translation of an old Telugu song(mantalu repe)

Discovering

Look for yourself
Find for yourself
Realize for yourself

I’m not hiding it
I’m not putting it away
It’s not under my control
As I’m not under my control

See it!
It’s in the glow of my eyes when you say ‘baby’
It’s in the gasp I let out when you hug me
It’s in the blush of my cheeks when you kiss on my ear
It’s in the tremors of my body when you touch
It’s in the laugh I give when you say ‘You’re the most beautiful one ’

Feel it!
The celebration that begins inside
The leap that my heart takes
The fire that sets inside
The rain that floods the heart’s gates

Discover my love!
For I can’t show it
Discover my love!!
For I didn’t trap it!
Discover my love!!
For I’m lost in it!

My love....for YOU!

Haunt me!

All the sweet fragrances
I can smell
All the beautiful sights
I can see
But i don't want to
No!!I won't!
My heart's paralyzed!
ugly in it's prime,
Gored and gashed ghastly!
Bleeding away...
Why did you let go off me?
Why did you leave me alone,
to deal with the enviable and the pitiable?
Return!Return back!
I can't stand this anymore!
I can't hug you
I can't kiss you
For you're no more
But at least let me feel your presence
Curse me!
Hurt me!
Hunt me!
Haunt me!

Leave and Let die!

 

When there is no reply to my magical three words,

When the reply is only a ‘long pause' accompanied by an awkward smile 

What the eyes try to avoid is caught by the heart

And it's not a hearty place to be

Kill the heart

Kill it at once instead of shredding it inch by inch as each day passes

Kill the pretension

Cos it ain't no camera, it's my heart.

And End this twisted thing you led me into, with my eyes closed

Leave me

Leave!! and Let die!

 

Uncast the Spell

You left me expressionless,
I don't feel sad or happy or even least bit angry;
I don't know where my heart beats now,cos all i hear is a mechanical interruptions
I'm not living.I simply exist.
You walked through that door and left me to wither.
But why don't i feel a thing?i wish i could just feel...
I'm a walking corpse!What have you done??
Uncast this spell!Uncast this spell!

Whenever!Wherever!However!

Why does he have such control over me?
What is it?Is it his eyes?
Those two sharp black eyes that hit me right in my heart..
Wherever he looks at me?
Or is it his voice?
That manly voice that makes me melt with the heat of passion, tenderly
May be it’s his arms
Those Strong arms that make me give up everything just for one moment wrapped around them…
No..
No. it’s him.The complete HIM
He makes me close my eyes…roll my neck…arch my back ..spread my legs and curl my toes…
Feeling every vein of my body ache,..aching for sheer pleasure..
Asking for more
Yearning.
Hungry for him
I need it and I need it for my existence
More of him!All of him!
Whenever!Wherever!However!

CARNAGE OF FEELINGS

I heard a breaking sound
Inside me,
When you said those words
I heard myself cry,
But then again there was not trace of a single tear
It were those broken pieces

Every piece whimpered, quivered and shivered
Every piece battled to stay together
Every piece tried to reach one another,
Every piece lamented, bawled, pleaded

You said it was for the best
But…
How is it best when I can’t see you anymore?
How is it best when I don’t get to hear your voice?
How is it best when I am not loved by you?
How is it best when we’re not together?

Oh! Forget it!
If you can forget me…
Well then So can I

I can forget those moments on the road, after the early morning drizzle
I can forget those moments in the lake, right after the sunset
I can forget those moments of you lying in my lap and playing with my hair
I can forget those moments of the “hide and seek” played around the house

Oh forget it!
Who am I lying to?
You?
Myself?
I know there’s no way out of this massacre you caused
It was not carnage of lives
It was CARNAGE OF FEELINGS

Smiling Tear

A smile spreads on my face
When I see two tots walk holding hands
A smile spreads on my face
When I see a kid looking like he has the world, rolling his tyre, buck naked

A tear rolls down my cheek
When I get a touching greeting card
A tear rolls down my cheek
When I get a tight hug from my best friend

A smile spreads on my face
When I feel the first drop of rain on my face
A smile spreads on my face
When I feel warmth of my blanket in a cold weather

A tear rolls down my cheek
When I see my grandma’s eyes full of emotion, holding my hand tight
A tear rolls down my cheek
When I see a passionate romantic moment

A smile spreads on my face
When I smell the mud on a rainy day
A smile spreads on my face
When I smell heavenly home-cooked dinner

A tear rolls down my cheek
When I realize suddenly how much has changed
A tear rolls down my cheek
When I realize suddenly that the person is no more around

A smile spreads on my face
When I go to my mom, in a new a sari and she looks at me like I am ‘all grown up’
A smile spreads on my face
When I go to the movies an hour late and friends looks as if they are gonna kill meA tear rolls down my cheek
When I see my parents like a couple of 20 year olds
A tear rolls down my cheek
When I see my family floating with laughterA smile spreads on my face
When I hear your voice,filling the emptiness
A smile spreads on my face
When I hear that you're meeting meA tear rolls down my cheek
When you reach for my hand and squeeze it…with a look of assuranceA tear rolls down my cheek
When you tell me that I am beautiful and meaning it when actually I look dreadful

A tear rolls down my face smiling its way through
when you say " I love You"

Healing Potion

I take the blows
Thrust by the known unknown
I’m walking wounded
Burdened by the cruelty and curses
Bruised by the betrayals

I am pining for your touch
To heal my scars
I am yearning for your kiss
To savor the sweet pain
Oh let it be worth the wrath

Take me to the world
Where I am the most beautiful
Where I am the most prized
Dazzlingly admired
Desperately wanted

Take me as I am
Fill me with you
Relinquish yourself
Let me be your queen
Let me be…
Let me be…

rush

My ‘someone’
My ‘someone’…

When I wore a new dress
I wanted someone to tell me “you look beautiful”

When I was sleeping alone during that cold night
I wanted someone to hold me tight

When my favorite song was playing
I wanted someone to dance with me

When I was walking on my own on the beach
I wanted someone’s footprints right beside mine

When I was dead scared about that interview
I wanted someone to kiss my forehead and wish me good luck

When I was lil girl I dreamt about someone
When I was a teen I waited for someone
When I was in my twenties I hoped for someone

When I met you
I knew what I waited for
I realized what I hoped for
I understood how lil I dreamt

You are the one
You are my ‘someone’

Another Nobody

Roadside, below an autumn tree

She rests reflecting the same dying spirit as the tree

Looking like a log from fizzled out fire

Groaning and moaning

Tired from batting the flies away

Lifeless, humorless face

Wrinkled like a blanket

Scared silence in those hollow glassy eyes

A corpse is better than her

Given up!

From the disease

Worn out!

From the begging

Coming is the winter

No place to go, except for another leafless and lifeless tree

Years upon her,

Joints slackened

A knot in the stomach

A hole in the heart

No reason for her to hope

No hope for her to live

“If she dies, who might be responsible for her death?”

Asks the fierce wind blowing away

Sucking away a bone, the stray dog stayed silent

Grabbing a fly, went the lizard on its way for another juicy one

No knight in sight to rescue this pile of bones

But the dark night spread diabolically

Raising its ugly head, waiting for the moment

The dust flew about in its way,

A used leaf platter came by, flying

“This was not my fault” lamented it…

It went flying; hoping may be it could save “Another Nobody”

The thing that fits me best is YOU!

 

You understand what i mean when i have no words to describe..

You get which dish i am talking about when i have no clue what it's name is..

You know "when" that i "actually" mean i "love" it..

You know when my temper is gonna go up...

You know what surprises me...

You know that,that simple gesture brings a smile on my face no matter what the situation is

You know when to leave me alone

You know when to hold me tight

You know how to make me happy

You know how to treat me right

The best thing that fits me is you!

You believe i am worth you..even when i seriously doubt it.

You think i am the most stunning woman even when my mom wouldn't think so...

You sing a song when i need it

You wrap me with a shawl,when i wouldn't know that was the thing, that was missing

You happily make me coffee in the wee hours of the night,just cos i feel like it...

The thing that fits me best is you!

I never dreamt of a castle..

just dreamt of my guy by my side embracing me lovingly...

I never needed an ostentatious candle light dinner

just my man playing with the curls of my hair..

I never wanted him to write me a poem..

Just an"I LOVE YOU" from his lips...as a whisper in my ears

You made them a reality,

enriched them in a way that it almost feels like it's a figment of my imagination

How could you have reached my dreams? 

How and How i wonder...

That you know me inside out...

That you know me more than i know myself...

Thats why and Oh that's why..

I know for sure now...

The thing that fits me best is YOU!

Uncork me!!

The senses...waiting to be heightened
The thirst..waiting to be quenched
The sensuality..waiting to be explored
The erotica...waiting to be unleashed!
Uncork me!

All the emotions bottled up...
waiting to be taken in by someone...

Just uncork me!
I'll be worth it!
I'll run deep in your veins.
I'll make you sweat it sweet
I am the pleasure you never knew...
I can give you the moment of immortality.
Just uncork me!!

Don't think!!!

It's not math...
Go by your greed!
Uncork me!
And know what is life!
Uncork me!
And know what is demise!
Uncork me!
And know what is paradise!

Hungry stars

I was growing
A lil hesitant to get onto the world
but eager to see it
The beautiful pleasant world.
I heard strange tongues,learned some,understood some.
In a land where "my" birth was a "not-so-happy" incident ,since my Father wanted a boy...it scared me a lil bit.
But i felt gifted for being a girl.
With these lil disturbing thoughts in my mind i was growing..
my arms,my legs,a stomach..i am whole.
I am getting restless now,there is not enough room for me here.
When are you going to let me out?
I started kicking to show my anxiousness and my suffocation.

My first look of this world,with a dirty green rug wrapped around me was that of the great moonlit sky.
Ah! such a great sight,now i know why they talk about moon so much.
The stars seemed to rejoice my birth,they were mighty sparkling.

i was impatient about experiencing the "world of wonders" ,but i felt a little tired,so i closed my eyes to take a little nap.

Suddenly i felt something cold,really icy. It took a lil time to open my eyes.
The frostiness grew around me at a faster rate and i seemed to go deeper and deeper into this coldness.
I wanted to talk but didn't know how,so i cried,screamed,wailed.

By now i was completely inside the translucent liquid.
Then i thought may be this was some kind of exercise every new-born has to grow through.
I stayed patient for a while.Still no sign of taking me out from this horror.
It was getting harder for me to breathe and my crying was going in vain.
Through the liquid the stars suddenly looked HUNGRY,they were laughing at me but there was something cold and evil about it.

My breathlessness began,
my heart was beating faster
and my lungs seemed to be blowing up.
What am i to do?
what did i do wrong?
i am just born.
i want to see the world..live in it..experience it.
hello!!!whats going on?
i am sorry if i did something wrong..
i tried to convey all these emotions in my cries..
but there was no sign of anyone.
i kept thinking ..what did i do wrong..?
then it dawned on me : i was a girl..!
that's what i did wrong..
i gave in.

Precious Little Memory

Precious little memory
engraved on my mind
Precious little memory
started the whole thing
Precious little memory
Makes me laugh at all random times
Precious little memory
Wants me to come back to you
Precious little memory
Wants me to feel your touch
Precious little memory
Reminds
Of the Lazy day
Of the Breezy night
Of the Crazy YOU

Wonder Years

Oh Let me Go back to
The pillow fights
The coffee nights
The big old tree of neem
The huge dicussion on a silly dream
Oh let me Visit again
The constant Gossip
The green Park trip
The Trading
The Teasing
Oh let me be there again
The laughter which had no reason
The crying for the treason
The petty Jealousies
The pretty Fantasies
Oh let me hear them again
The I-don't -give-a-damns
The devil-may-cares
The friendly folks
The silly jokes
Oh let me see that again
Those years of Wonderfulness
Those months of Brightness
Those days of Freshness
Those minutes of HAPPINESS

He Does it for a Reason!

God made us fall in love blindly
Fully Fruitfully Foolishly
Let it bloom
God made us fall in love madly
Greedily Gladly Grandly
Let it laugh
God made us fall in love completely
Wickedly,Worthily,Wondrously
Let it grow
God made us fall in love wishfully
Deeply Dearly Dramatically
Let it unwind
Without you I am empty as a cave
For a glimpse I slave I crave
With you I am full as a moon
For a touch I groan I moan
Thats why!! and That's why!!
God made us fall in love famously
LET IT LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One Last Kiss!

everyone got a tear in their eye
I knew everything was ephemeral
But still i questioned God "Why?"
It's spring then why was the whether so sepulchral??
I felt in my heart a spasm
is this all my phantasm?
In a trice
I see her fly like an angel so serene so peaceful
I try to push the reason that could suffice
Ah!! her eyes so beautiful
For the last time
She tried to touch me,feel me
to cherish the moments of our prime
Blimey!!
A warmth set me ablaze
that feeling once again exploded
It made me amaze
it was all i wanted,desperately needed
One last kiss,one lasting experience
God have mercy!
Please give me the endurance
Why isn't this easyOne last kiss!One last kiss!

The Longing

Love gushing out of the heart's brim
Could I possibly ever be grim?
laugh!!
My Lochinvar, finally mine
With him I'll live,play and dine
Oh!please let me prance ahead
On the road of future i want to tread

My Soldier

The atmosphere was never this merrier
with sweets and presents piling up in the foyer
But once again I heard him clamour
as there was another tremor
he's actually my protector
But Diwali gives him the terror
AS the sound gets louder
he gets closer
when i urge him to be bolder
He wears the face of a friar
I find him searching for a buffer
to shield himself from the human pleasure
When the celebrations are over
he gets under his comforter
my tailed little faithful SOLDIER